The Runescape Rebelz, 2009-2012
by MstrMonopolyWhat's the greatest story ever told, you ask? Well, I don't know a single epic saga greater than the one The Runescape Rebelz have provided. Now, you might be calling me crazy - this is a world in which the Lord of the Rings exists, after all. But after you read these stories, you'll probably consider the Lord of the Rings to be crappy shit all too obsessed with elves.
I joined this clan in June 2009 - one of three notable members to join on the same day, along with a temperamental British guy named Master_Liono and some rich guy who had 99 RC before RuneSpan, Moghadasian. Both of these guys always showed up to wars, so they're cool in my book. But for the first three months of my TRR tenure, I basically only hung around in the Clan Chat - after three months, I only had 40 posts or so on the forums, almost all of them "gratz" or some stupid spam like that. Some of the more notable members I met at the time were Blexun, back when he was nice to everyone, and Nuggeh, a beloved level 3 skiller, back when he was just three years old instead of four. Together, we formed the epic IRC channel #mindmyskillz, an IRC whose fortunes paralleled those of TRR's, but with a lot more lulz and a lot more Edwin. Later invites to #mindmyskillz included WilsonsWar and Isaiah_T. Seriously, everything fun and noteworthy happened in IRC.
After about three months, I got promoted to events team after being heartily encouraged by David. I still didn't use the forums that much, but that changed after I started posting lots of reflections. It was around this time that major drama started going down. One of the Council members, Lord_Caspen, who everyone hated because he always bragged about his stats despite the fact that his account was given to him, plus he was a roleplaying douchebag, started stirring up some trouble. Caspen never really worked and was more famous for the phrase "Hail and well met, friend [x]," which was parodied mercilessly by the denizens of #mindmyskillz after Caspen's departure. Anyway, Caspen got in a serious feud with Illini, the old leader of TRR that happened when Caspen's even more retarded friend Wil_0rtiz started claiming that all poor people were dumb. When Illini understandably attacked Mr. 0rtiz for this, Caspen appealed to TRR's other founder, Traaginen. Unfortunately, Caspen and David were also in a fight because David had told him that a roleplaying requirement for the clan was retarded. Caspen then quit in a huff. I don't have the picture on me, but Caspen was a ginger also.
Anyway, Caspen's welcome departure from the clan opened up a Council spot for a hard-working Events Team member named MstrMonopoly. I joined Blexun and a southerner fond of using the n-word, Jaker-out, on the Council. Needless to say, I was the only one who was really doing good work on the Council at the time, but we also had two excellent leaders in Jamie and Blue_Speed, both of whom were very charismatic and knew how to inspire a clan. We also had two other extremely important members, Allan, our webmaster, and Henry, our resident troll. Allan, to put things simply, knew his shit. Although he could be a bit of a big spender when it came to web hosting, and always changed his mind on which hosting service the Rebelz should use, he was undeniably a smart guy. Then, there was Henry. To be honest, I could write about Henry more than pretty much anyone else in this clan. Not only was Henry a great council member and probably one of the two best warrers TRR has ever had (the other being Drags, who won war MVP with excellent binding more often than probably anyone else), he was also a masterful troll. I remember one incident with an emo kid named Ninja who basically spammed the clanchat with crummy stuff related to his problems. Basically, Henry flamed him out of the clan chat. While this may have been bad for Ninja's life, it was great for the clanchat and Rebel life and clanchat flourished throughout late 2009 and early 2010.
There was another member of less import to the clan's history but of much greater import to clan culture - Pkth4tn3l50n, or Nelson. Nelson was often ridiculed for his stupidity and constant bragging, but truth be told he was a hilarious guy, despite being banned at least three times from the clan. The first helped lead to the split between Caspen and David, because Caspen hated Nelson and the clan leaders Jamie and David honestly didn't mind his particular brand of marijuana-drenched humor.
And the second incident led in part to the first great schism of TRR. It happened when Nelson got on Jamie's account and kicked people who insulted him from the clan chat for an hour. While this was undeniably a clusterfuck, it further highlighted the differences in leadership style between David, a natural taskmaster, and Jamie, who was far more laidback. In March 2010, discontent between TRR's leader, Jamie, and its founder, David, led directly to the first and at least second most successful TRR breakway clan, Blessed Hunters (BH). BH had strong support from TRR's webmaster, Allan, and a couple of critical members including Jaker-out and Nelson. However, BH ultimately proved to be non-threatening to TRR (its members still hung out frequently in TRR IRCs and the clan-chat) and would often invite TRR members to its events. After a month, BH dissolved because there wasn't really enough to differentiate itself from TRR, although it did run a fair number of events and attract a few high level players. Most BH members, like Nelson, Yailux, and Allan (who never really left) came back to TRR. The others, like Jamie, disappeared for a while. We were running on a one-leader system.
The thing was, though, that leader wasn't Blue. It was me. After Blue joined the army and thus had less time to fake fight dragons, David noticed that we had run out of leaders and promoted me. In addition, David stepped into more of an active role as clan leader.
There was a problem with TRR at the time, though. The usual pre-summer lull hit and suddenly we were left with all of one member doing work, the Councilman RaianTFallen, formerly of the recruitment team. Raian was another emo kid but one who could be counted on to provide a solid job when necessary. It thus must have been a shock to him when, after approximately two weeks, David and I decided to fire pretty much everyone on the staff as part of a clean-up and allow them to reapply for their positions. This move backfired, as Raian got peeved and formed his own clan, Stricken By Fate (SBF). Stricken By Fate had the backing of longtime hilarious member Aliath and his goon, Techy, who was mean to me for no good reason. It's probably because I associated with Blexun and Techy hated Blexun. This goes back to another time when Techy, Blexun, Aliath, and a guy named Shampooninja were best of friends and had a League of Evil that was funny when Shampy was there but unfunny when he wasn't and in general fell apart and it was like Sex and the City only the actors were more bangable. But that's before my time, and it may surprise some of you but for most of my tenure here I pretty much felt like a newbie. Anyway, SBF managed to pull in Morkid, this awesome Israeli guy who I thought would never betray us. However, after pulling in some of the obvious defectors like Starchar, a guy who hung around on ET doing literally nothing for 2 years, SBF fell apart and became Epitaph, a new clan that made Aliath co-leader. As with all Aliath clans, it, too, fell apart, and the members who joined came crawling back to rejoin the Rebelz juggernaut.
Through all this turmoil, TRR was still going strong - hey, it was summer 2010, after all, TRR's never had a bad summer. We had an impressive new ET - led by the infamous Bgs1977. Bgs, better known as Jeremy, was an extremely active Events Team member, probably the best I've ever had as a leader in TRR. We also had a bunch of good recruiters at the time, led by Fergal, a kid who at 12 was more mature than another member, Delroth, will be at 40. The core staff was firing on all cylinders as we barged through the summer. We were averaging 30-40 topics that had been bumped in the past 24 hours, often pulled 30-40 or more to wars, and had consistent events for the first time in TRR's history - many created by BGS, who even on council was creating 3 events a week. It was a renaissance period for TRR, and one of the few times we went basically without major drama. Sure, there was Nelson, and the constant fighting with Ancient Legion (for those of you who don't know, AL is our rival clan. They are obsessed with disqualifying us based on retarded technicalities and then when we try to do it, they laugh and claim they would have won anyway. Seriously, those guys are idiots, and warring them just for the fun of watching their post-war reaction was priceless) but TRR stayed mostly stable throughout the summer.
Sadly, all good things have to come to an end. Despite Jeremy's terrific work ethic and mostly on-point liberal commentary, he had a weakness - a weakness for pornography. Jeremy propositioned pretty much every member of the clan he knew well for nudes, guys and girls alike. He became obsessed with this one girl from the Netherlands, PureUranium, and it was this struggle that ultimately defined Jeremy's tenure as a Council member. Although Jeremy's behavior was tolerated to an extent because of his productivity, he did two things that crossed the line - one, he propositioned nudes from someone he didn't know well and caused them basically to quit the clan, and two, he posted pornography in #rebelz after David and I speciifically told him not to. This led to Jeremy's first firing from Council. However, we did not tell Jeremy that he could never be Council again.
And thus the Lorena saga started. Maybe it was the fact that she had pretty blue eyes. Maybe it was the fact that she was a "lying, scheming bitch." Maybe it was the fact that she had tits and played Runescape. Whatever the reason, TRR fell head over heels for her in October 2010. And when I say TRR, I mean Jeremy, Delly, and IRC stalwart xdan. While Delly's involvement with Lorena was never serious because of his high, girlish Scottish voice and his preoccupation with kilts, the fight between xdan and Jeremy led to a serious rift in clan relations. Jeremy became increasingly depressed, planning to commit suicide multiple times, and listening to Frank Sinatra on repeat for hours. Meanwhile, Lorena continued to lead him on. This only worsened Jeremy's depression. Soon, it was revealed that a fourth player had staked a claim to Lorena's heart - Allan. Somehow, Allan obtained a sexually graphic (but not nude) picture of Lorena and it got reposted endlessly by Jeremy, Dan, Delly, and yeah, a fucking fifth dude, Ozzy_Rules_U. Ozzy, also known as Carter Weinman, was honestly a decent person most of the time, until later, and you'll find out about that. While this was all fine and dandy as long as it was going on in private channels, a fight over Lorena ensued. Allan presented himself as a man above this chaos but he was really interested in her too. The main players, however, were Jeremy and Dan, and Jeremy once again posted nude pictures of girls in #rebelz.
For any other member, this probably would have earned a slap on the wrist. Hell, Allan linked to pornography literally the day before. I realize now that this was a double standard and letting go of things, especially considering Jeremy's precarious mental state at the time, was the best idea. However, the fact stands that David and I had repeatedly warned Jeremy not to get involved with nudes at the time, so we demoted Jeremy back to member. Again, we told him that he could work his way back up to High Council, but this time he was having none of it, and sulked around a few more days before forming what was probably the most successful TRR branchoff and what probably helped kill it temporarly, The Legacy of Legends (TLoL).
Both Fergal and Jeremy were very popular members and when they formed their clan a lot of TRR members joined TLoL. TRR and TLoL were always at odds with each other and we both sort of hated each other. This was because TRR felt that TLoL was actively recruiting from TRR (which they were at some point) and because TLoL thought that this was justified if people were sick of TRR (which some people were). Anyway, Jeremy and Fergal ran the clan starting in October 2010. For a while, the rivalry ignited both clans - activity was high on the forums, and good ol' one-upsmanship kept events and recruitment running. Then, the winter hit. Usually, winter coincides with a decline in activity anyway. However, this time it was even worse than usual due to the TRR player-base being split up between TRR and TLoL. Events basically ceased functioning, and recruitment dried up. In addition, I grew really busy with other commitments and resigned my leadership position in TRR, and the loyal council member Terravilla replaced me as clan leader. I don't know much about the next three months or so but what I do know is that TRR was largely dead when I came back.
When I DID come back, I found that both TRR and TLoL were in a pretty bad place. TRR was arguably worse at this point, actually. Although tLoL didn't have much clan chat activity, TRR didn't even have a set of forums. It was around this time that in a fit of desperation, David and I promoted Delroth to Council - and lo and behold, he actually did some legit work the first week he was on the Council. Fortunately, TRR got back together just in time for summer, and thankfully another old member came back to provide some posts - T_ranger101, who basically was the events team for a good part of the summer of 2011. It was at this time that relations between TRR and tLoL really turned sour. This was because of three incidents, and I will share the blame between TRR and TLoL because it's only fair.
1. TLoL somehow recruited the traitor Just_Kaiden into being a mole
Without Fergal's knowlege, Jeremy decided to get a leg up on TRR by recruiting TRR Council holdover Kaiden to his cause. During this time, Jeremy stole a fuckton of Council logs and found out that
2. TRR made a note to poach StarTrip back from tLoL
StarTrip, otherwise known as one of the top 5 recruiters in TRR history, had fled to tLoL because, yeah, TRR's forums blew up. TRR always wanted StarTrip back because we felt he had left during a time of confusion, and tLoL always felt the opposite.
Ozzy defected from TRR to TLoL because he was promised a ranking position. This is why no one likes him. He also made a big shitstorm out of the decision, in similar fashion to LeBron James's "The Decision," and in the end Ozzy won zero rings.
Anyway, TRR and tLoL hated each other at this time. TRR had overtaken TLoL in terms of activity by midsummer due to its larger base of past players, though, and the IRC, once tLoL's main hangout due to their spammers Jeremy and Fergal, had started to decline in membership and activity, and was mostly limited to ranking members. Relationships started to ease up, especially between the leaders of the clan.
The most important returnee besides T_ranger was CrazyCow, who quickly became council and helped with the administration of the clan. He was a decent Council member over the summer but then he left due to school around November.
Then Heated Deus flipped his shit for no apparent reason. He bitched and moaned about literally everything, especially when we found out Kaiden was the mole. We had ignored the incident for a while because who gives a shit, and eventually we found out it actually was Kaiden because the only other possible person was Delly and Delly is too retarded to do anything. Basically, Deus bitched about us demoting Kaiden even though it was clear Kaiden was the mole and then he quit. The Deus incident somehow managed to fire up tensions. It was at this time that I casually mentioned to my brother that I wouldn't mind if tLoL's website was completely destroyed. I shouldn't have said that. By the time August rolled around, TRR and TLoL were on the best of terms, helped by a girl named Emily who literally everyone liked - it was a wonder she didn't become another Lorena. It's probably because Emily wasn't a complete manipulatory bitch. Anyway, Emily's parents were crazy and right after she entered into a fateful e-relationship with Jeremy they took her internet away. Jeremy was left in a state of ruin.
And then my birthday rolled around. I take full responsibility for the actions of my brother on my birthday, and I am completely fine with tLoL members blaming me for this. Basically, he hacked LeBrozzy and used his account to seriously fuck up tLoL's website. This was more symbolic than anything, though (and Fergal can back me up here). tLoL got a new website. The most important thing to take away from that mishap is that tLoLers got sick of the drama and quit. This, combined with Jeremy's mental state because of the loss of Emily and Fergal's decreased activity because of school effectively killed TLoL. Fergal later returned to lead us.