Bacon Helmet

This is terrifying.

JUST!!! no

The utility of this is phenomenal. Protects you when you're battling a cave bear in combat. Replenishes your calories if you have to run away from said fight without any victory meat. If you're injured, you can use the strips to form a flesh bandage.

Plus it looks delicious.

I would have totally ate that instead of wearing the damn thing, i mean really WTF Madonna

wtf

Shut up and take my money