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Paper Towels

Posted by cheekychips, 13 April 2012 · 33,939 views

Its 1 in the morning, and I found myself here procrastinating as usual. Before long, the red solo cup to my left was tipped over, and its cold contents sitting in my crotch. First instinct? Paper towels. I often find that when I run to grab paper towels, I am reminded why I dislike them so much. Prepare yourselves, i'm about to Andy Rooney on dis shiz.

You can never use just one. No. I dont care what any commercial says, i dont care how absorbant it says it is on the bag. When something spills, you're grabbing a shit ton of them. I've tried using just one, I really have. It doesnt work, it never works. Its 256 times more absorbant? Great, 256 times more absorbant than what? Stone?

Posted Image
You took too many? You want to roll them back up? shit, that aint happenin. No my friend, you're just going to have to settle for this.

Obviously as a college student. I dont have much money. Laundry is tied up a lot. So when something spills, I depend on paper towels to do the job. They dont. Rubbing them into the ground accompanied with windex only gives your carpet what i like to call "The Dandruff Effect"TM Where rolled up bits of paper embed themselves deep in the carpet and require more cleaning to remove. Great.

Honestly, they just seem wasteful. When I look in a trashcan and see an enormous ball of paper there to greet me, I cant help but wonder where it all goes. Where it all builds up? I'm not much of environmentalist, but it bothers me to see windex soaked balls of paper disappear daily.

So thats my rant for today. Peace.


Very good entry :) I really do agree with you aswell. I don't think I got as much of a problem with papertowels, propably because I usualy don't spill stuff.
Lmao, really creative entry. I'm impressed and glad that we have another user with a blog.

I myself have been often defeated by the mighty dandruff effect. Also by comic sans.

But diet root beer? Really?
Two words. Sham. Wow.

But seriously, I just use my bath towels to clean up spilled stuff. Laundry detergent is also ridiculously expensive for one bottle.
The most horrible realization I made in college was how much laundry detergent costs.
I almost spit my Coke all over the screen while reading this. Well done, indeed.
By the way, you spelled ridiculousness wrong.
Haha that was great!
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